Ahh, what would summertime be without some stuff getting blown the hell up? It’s that time of year where Hollywood unleashes their arsenal of supercool and over-the-top movies. Funded by big budgets and even bigger action sequences, rest assured that the summer movie blockbuster has become a touchstone in our pop culture. From Memorial Day onward, every weekend is filled with a newer, bigger movie that Hollywood execs hope keep you entertained…at least, long enough to collect your money.
What makes the summertime blockbuster so important is that we’re usually looking to be enthralled and swept away at the movies and what better way than to be wrapped up in an over-the-top, BIG budget, high stakes film. And, even though we know that there’s a formula to most of these movies, we really don’t care because we’re willing to embrace the fantasy of it all for approximately two hours.
Here’s 6 truths about most summer movie blockbusters:
1. Eye Candy. There is going to be so much visual stimulation that your eyes will have mini orgasms from the opening credits until the movie comes out on DVD. Unbelievably attractive people are going to run around and save the day, blow things up, etc. Here’s what to expect – lots and lots of abs. Guys with ridiculous abs of steel are either saving the day or ruining the world. Also, be prepared to be bombarded by hot women. Beautiful and sexy ladies are always around when the world is in danger.
2. Superheroes, Superheroes, Superheroes. Listen, everyone has a magical power obviously and with a little back story they will, along with the audience discover this. Thankfully, just in time, because the villain just showed up and we need someone to save the D.A.Y. We love superheroes so much that Hollywood is digging up every one ever created and rejuvenating old franchises. But do we get tired of it? No, we want to see our favorites continue to the World.
3. Witty banter is key. Have your armory of one-liners ready to go. I don’t know why but we like our leads to be witty, funny and our villains to add a little snark to their destructive plans. Even a funny sidekick will do. Big explosions aren’t enough, appeal to our comedic side at certain moments and you will have us hooked. If they’re lucky, we will be quoting the movie ad nauseum, cementing its place in pop culture.
4. You, the regular guy can save the world. Well, that is if you ever find yourself in some alternate universe where this kind of thing goes down. We love watching the hero find out that they are actually the hero. It appeals to our regular joe schmo sensibility.
5. There’s never enough time and always enough time to save the day. Time is a pretty important variable in the blockbuster movie formula. We are always running out of time – before the aliens land and attack. {Side note: What is it with aliens always trying to attack us? Earth is a magnet for extra-terrestrials wanting to destroy us} The megalomaniacal super villain is going to destroy some major city in t-minus 12 hours. Then, everyone in the movie starts sweating bullets because it takes 11 hours and 58 minutes to track down who & what is needed and only 2 min to save the world. Only 2 mins.
6. You can almost always bet your money that there will be a sequel. Especially, if the movie has done so well that the Hollywood execs are patting each other on the back. In fact, get your $14 ready now for that ticket. Because in all seriousness, don’t you want to find out how the world gets saved again?? Yes, yes you do.
Tagged with: dark knight rises • independence day • summer blockbusters • summer films • superheroes • the amazing spider-man • the avengers • the incredible hulk
Please keep in mind that comments are moderated and rel="nofollow" is in use. So, please do not use a spammy keyword or a domain as your name, or it will be deleted. Let us have a personal and meaningful conversation instead.
